The birth of your own child is an absolute state of emergency, suspended between hope and fear, pain and happiness and sometimes even life and death. Without exaggerating, it can be said to be a transformational act.
The parents' lives will never be the same again as they were before their child's life began. At such an existential extreme, it can be easy to feel powerless within the birth process. And when this happens, the wounds can go particularly deep due to the absolute vulnerability.
Birth trauma is a serious psychological injury resulting from violence during childbirth, regardless of whether it is emotional or physical. But what exactly is birth trauma? What long-term consequences can a traumatic birth of a child have? And how can you come to terms with such a birth? We answer these and other questions in the following article.
Birth trauma - an injury to the soul
Many mothers experience an absolutely harmonious and wonderful pregnancy. The birth of their own child is the crowning glory. At the same time, it marks the transition into a new, exciting phase of life.
Despite all the anticipation, many expectant mothers realize that giving birth is not always easy and can sometimes be a real feat of strength.
But what actually happens when mothers feel frozen inside after the birth of their baby, feel completely abandoned or have the feeling that they have been ignored during the birth? What if an intervention is carried out without prior consent?
When do we speak of birth trauma?
When we talk about birth trauma , most people associate it less with the mother than with the newborn baby. However, violence during childbirth is unfortunately not uncommon. Instead of a self-determined birth experience, women giving birth experience the birth of their child as a traumatic event.
Not every woman affected by violence during childbirth is also affected by birth trauma, but the typical symptoms can also be found in women who think they have given birth without violence. Many traumatized mothers have experienced complications during childbirth as dramatic, were not properly informed or the delivery became a nightmare due to physical violence.
Birth trauma in babies
It is also quite possible that your baby experienced their own birth as traumatic. For each of us, birth is stored deep in our subconscious. It is therefore possible that your baby wants to communicatethe pain they experienced by cryingover and over again. The Austrian psychoanalyst Otto Renk called birth an "overwhelming experience of fear" for the foetus and argued that every single person is traumatized by their birth.
Nevertheless, not every child is a cry baby and in most cases, the start in life seems to be handled well. Even if there are additional complications such as a caesarean section or even a forceps delivery, it depends on many different factors whether trauma occurs, how severe it is and what your baby needs to resolve it.
The topic of birth trauma: the long-term effects
Many women are unaware that a traumatic birth can later trigger various illnesses. The term "Traumata" comes from the ancient Greek and means "wounds".
While it is also used in medicine for physical injuries, in common parlance it is mainly used for emotional wounds. If you have experienced a traumatizing birth, this can manifest itself later in the form of various symptoms, e.g. flashbacks, such as thoughts, images, words that suddenly flash in your head or if you cry a lot often and seemingly for no reason.
These are all attempts by your psyche to process what you have experienced. It is also common for those affected to feel guilty because mental suffering unfortunately still smacks of personal failure. Keep reminding yourself that you are not to blame.
Indication of birth trauma
Do you have symptoms related to mental illness caused by the birth and are still struggling with the birth trauma three months later? Seeking professional help is not a failure. Of course, this is especially true if you notice that you can no longer cope with everyday life.
This important topic is also the subject of a double episode of Full Time Tired - The Parenting Podcast from swing2sleep entitled "How to stay connected with your excessively crying baby after a difficult birth". In the two parts of this episode, our Anika has prenatal psychologist Anabel as a guest.
Anabel not only accompanies women during and after birth, but also supports expectant mothers during pregnancy to strengthen their bond with their unborn baby. After traumatic births, she is on hand to intervene at an early stage and stabilize the bonding system between mother and child in good time.
Coming to terms with the birth: Tips and help
After a particularly difficult and stressful birth, our self-healing powers may not be sufficient. In addition to debriefing the birth, for example with a trauma expert or a psychotherapist, it is also advisable to take measures at home to work through the birth experience.
The art of abdominal breathing
Abdominal breathing is an important self-healing tool that is excellent for calming the autonomic nervous system.
Genuine closeness to your child is only really possible if there is an inner connection to your own body. Prolonged crying from your baby or the experience of a traumatic birth activates the sympathetic nervous system. This is the part of our autonomic nervous system that is responsible for stress reactions such as increased heart rate and the release of adrenaline.
If you have your baby in your arms and the sympathetic nervous system is activated, you can bounce on the Pezzi ball for as long as you like. Your breathing is still shallow, your muscles are still tense and the stress hormone release is running at full speed. By consciously breathing into your tummy, you and your baby can relax more in everyday life.
The swing2sleep also helps parents to relax
Our swing2sleep spring cradle can also be a great help. Many babies immediately feel transported back to the time of their pregnancy in the cradle due to the rhythmic rocking and the cuddly closeness.
This gives them a sense of security in which they can easily relax. Such moments of stillness areparticularly valuablefor a cry baby, so use them wisely to gradually leave the trauma behind you and recharge your batteries.
Many women suffer from trauma
The extreme situation of childbirth can cause trauma to mother or child. Unwanted episiotomy, violent obstetricians and midwives, lying under duress during childbirth or being pushed on the stomach with force - there are many different situations that people classify as a traumatic experience.
Having a child gives women the feeling that they are only allowed to feel gratitude and have to push aside the negative feelings. In most cases, the psyche processes this with its own self-healing powers. In very severe cases, professional help is available to support you.
But even the area between very mild and very severe is no man's land. With techniques such as abdominal breathing and aids such as swing2sleep, you have a broad portfolio of tools at your disposal to help you overcome this crisis together and strengthen your bond.
